1. |
Tired I
03:50
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|
Consumed by my need to perform
To maintain
I said I’m working on it
But I can’t promise you anything
I think I will go to bed soon
And all of my plants will die with me
It’s like I’m stuck under my pillows
I need to wash my clothes
I need to take out the trash
I need to stand up straight
And take good care of you
I thought it was fine forever
Like I think everytime
But it’s like I’m stuck to the couch
And I’m just so tired
It’s like I like myself mental
Like life was more vivid then
I think I’m working on it
Smiling and nodding and not looking dead
And I touch their hands
And I see my friends
And I’m trying again again again again
I need to wash my clothes
I need to take out the trash
I need to stand up straight
And take good care of you
I thought it was fine forever
Like I think everytime
It’s been raining for a while
But not even the sun could wake me up
I think I will go to bed soon
And all of my plants will die with me
It’s like I’m stuck under my pillows
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2. |
Softie
03:41
|
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|
I just wanna tell you how I feel
But I don’t talk about my misery
To you, to no one
Don’t wanna drag you in
I just try to tell you how I deal
With all the shit I think
All the dark I see
And how I push through anyway
I do it all for you
I break my back for you
It's all I wanna do
I feel like a shell of a person
some new version of me
something you didn’t think
I would be
Can’t act like I care
Can’t tell you enough
You’re enough
Can’t bring myself to say loud that I love you
I just hope you know
I am tired of feeling in control
Being good and being pure
It’s overrated
Complicated
And I’m off my meds now
And I’m doing it again
And it’s getting harder acting like a friend
Can’t act like I care
Can’t tell you enough
You’re enough
Can’t bring myself to say loud that I love you
I just hope you know
I just hope you know
I just hope it shows
I’m trying harder
I’m trying harder than before
I just hope you know
I just hope it shows
I’m trying harder
I’m trying harder than before
I just hope you know
I just hope you know
I just hope you know
I just hope you know
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3. |
Pavements
02:59
|
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|
Who the hell made me like this?
And when the fuck am I done?
Somebody walking high on the graveyard
Could I ever be high like that
Always waiting for the time
When I feel shit again
I try to not care about
That they think that we are
The saddest couple they have ever seen
I dreamt that they were tearing off my skin
And the patterns on the pavement is the only thing that I can see clear
But I don’t need to see it clear
I got so used to being weird
My depression is a weapon
It’s the only thing that makes me feel here
I want them to stare at me
And wonder if I’ve gone insane
Wonder what I’m thinking of
And try to make some sense of me
Would it matter if I got some help?
I told them that I’m never gonna change
And the numbers on my paycheck is the only thing that I can see clear
But I don’t need to see it clear
I got so used to being weird
My depression is a weapon
It’s the only thing that makes me feel here
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4. |
Swedish Summer
03:00
|
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|
Great job, well done
I pat my own back
Fucking baptise me and bless my soul
There's no baltic sea between us
I want more than I can have
I'm too much
Hey hey hey
Stop asking me when
I can't care for another when I can't care for myself
Hey hey hey
I keep setting the bar higher than I can reach
And when I reach I just let go
The trees are finally green
But you hurt me
I feel like I'm wasting my body
Always working on myself
Like I'm not finished yet
I want it to stop
I want it to shut up
Shut up
Hey hey hey
Stop asking me when
I can't care for another when I can't care for myself
Hey hey hey
I keep setting the bar higher than I can reach
And when I reach I just let go
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5. |
Tired II
04:45
|
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|
These apartment walls
Can’t hear me call for change
Watch my stupid face
As I repeat the same routine again
And I shake my head
And I go back to bed
Have a little faith
Back to crying in public again
As stubborn as I am
I know I can hold on
Hoping they will understand
that I leave so many things unsaid
I know I can
I aspire to be a dream
to wake up be pristine
But it’s whatever man
They’ve got a new dog now
And I could never be the last to cross the finish line
so I run myself out
Have a little faith
Back to crying in public again
As stubborn as I am
I know I can hold on
Hoping they will understand
that I leave so many things unsaid
I know I can
And I obsess again
I get stuck on things
I know it’s gross
I can’t let things go
And I hope that when I die
they won’t remember what I’m like
That I’m absurd
And that I’m hurt
And just so tired
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6. |
Cope
03:00
|
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|
Coping with myself like a champ
Wish I didn’t make myself sad
If I should take a swing at it
And be gone by 25
Would someone miss me at all
How long would I wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for me
Wait for me
You told me I should ask for help
I always quit while I’m ahead
Don’t need someone to tell me
What I am and what I’m not
I’m not afraid of being soft
Just wait for me
Wait for me
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7. |
New Dog
03:36
|
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|
Things have gotten out of hand
Even with the new pills
Did I take one today?
I’ve been trying so hard
To be like I was
You say I'm so young
But I already fucked up so many times
I don't seem that type
You are just like me
At first glance
But maybe I wasn’t the one to judge
I don’t seem that kind
It’s not on my mind
Anymore
And I think I may be making myself sad
Are we still friends?
I’m not the same
Are we still friends?
It’s not the same
Are we still friends?
I’m not the same
Are we still friends?
It’s not the same
Anymore
Used to break my back for everyone
But I don’t even know this dog
And I crave the comfort of it all
I've been trying again
Trying to be someone
Who can talk and be smart about it all
Suddenly people
They seem to tell me things
They see my face
I’ve stopped watching the same movies
Over and over again
And I ask myself
Are we still friends?
Are we still friends?
I’m not the same
Are we still friends?
It’s not the same
Are we still friends?
I’m not the same
Are we still friends?
It’s not the same
Anymore
And I’ve stopped watching the same movies
Over and over again
And I ask myself
Are we still friends?
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8. |
||||
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The words are stuck inside my head
Talk about something
Talk back to me
Tell me that you’re feeling something
And it still annoys me
that they don’t know me
and they won’t ever know
Oh
Have you ever been in love?
Have you ever been in love?
Have you ever been in love?
I have, I have
Come pick me up
I’ve grown into your arms
I know I still make you mad
But you’re cool with that
You made me hate being alone
I don’t care who I am anymore
There’s nothing that I wanna be
But yours
Have you ever been in love?
Have you ever been in love?
Have you ever been in love?
I am, I am
Have you ever been in love?
Have you ever been in love?
Have you ever been in love?
I am, I am
You made me hate being alone
I don’t care who I am anymore
There’s nothing that I wanna be
But yours
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9. |
Adore You
02:49
|
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I don’t wanna break up
I don’t wanna be friends
I don’t wanna leave you
I just wanna pretend
The more I’m thinking of it
I’m sure I’m being honest
I should have come out to you earlier
Maybe I’ve been thinking about
Telling you some things about me
You don’t know, I don’t know
Maybe I’ve been thinking about
Telling you some things about me
You don’t know, I don’t know anymore
Any less
But I adore you
I wanna know who I am
But I don’t care
You’re as deep as the ocean
I’m blue as my eyes
And maybe it’s maybe it’s alright
To do wrong this time
We’ll be fine even though
I’m so wrong so many times
Maybe I’ve been thinking about
Telling you some things about me
You don’t know, I don’t know
Maybe I’ve been thinking about
Telling you some things about me
You don’t know, I don’t know anymore
Any less
But I adore you
I adore you
|
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10. |
Twenty-two Dreaming
03:37
|
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|
I dream about them
Holding me down
But I'm awake and
I'm trying to change
Always
I wake up ten times every night
And I call your name
Cause I'm afraid
Don't wanna be the same, the same
Don't wanna feel the grey of it
Always
Don't wanna feel afraid
Always
Always
Always
I wish I had it in me
Didn't waste my energy
Get over-worked so easily
Always
Don't wanna feel the grey of it
Always
Don't wanna feel afraid
Always
Always
Always
I want to stop trying
I don't need to feel
I’ll soon be 23
And I am sick of it
Always
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11. |
Tabs
02:53
|
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My desktop has been a mess
Tabs open in my head
I like to think that I always smile
but I know that I don’t
I’m still darker than you know
If I could go to sleep on time
It might be time to figure it out
I waste my time
I grow my hair out
I’m somebody else now
I wish I had a car
So we could drive
Away from here
And sleep it off
I don’t care
Dreading every word in every email
I can barely read the subject
Panicking and writing things
that I erase again and never send
What’s wrong with me?
I wish I had a car
So we could drive
Away from here
And sleep it off
I don’t care
If I could go to sleep on time
It might be time to figure it out
I waste my time
I grow my hair out
I’m somebody else now
I’m somebody else now
I don’t care
|
||||
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