1. |
Hate To Fall Asleep
04:13
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I try
to see the great in everything I see
but I close my eyes
I grieve
the minutes that I try to keep
I count them on my fingers instead
I lift my head
I decide that this time i'm okay
and nights will never be as long as I made them to be
I never said was a grateful friend
I cry them out
my tired eyes
not strong enough to give
it all to you
I mean
the words I scream in blurry ears
the only thing I cannot hear
I sleep
enough to know I hate the dark
I count the nights i stay awake
I cry them out
my tired eyes
not strong enough to give
it all to you
I keep my feet up in the bed
I hide my sad face in my hands
but it makes me smile
to think that people laugh at me
when I can barely laugh at myself
I cry them out
my tired eyes
not strong enough to give
it all to you
it all to you
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2. |
I Don't Pretend
03:18
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transparent I cling
to things that are not real
I tried to be an optimist
but I forgot to think that way
take me somwhere
somewhere where I do not detest
the things that I say in my head
it always makes me mad
can't walk away from it
I raise my voice but can't
say what I want you to know
I take it back the things I've said
every time I close my eyes
mother tell me why I'm like this
and why I can't be myself or act
the way that I pretend I am
take me somewhere
somwhere where I do not pretend
to be a trace of someone else's hands
I take it back the things I've said
it always makes me mad
can't walk away from it
I raise my voice but can't
say what I want you to know
I take it back the things I've said
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3. |
Nobody Else
04:02
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I take my picture with the flash off
I change my clothes with the blinds closed
I wanna feel this on my own
I want to like one of my songs
I don't wanna cry when I'm gone from home
but I don't need nobody else
nobody else but me
I run away from things I am
and every thing I feel I can't
things in a body I can't feel
the only place where I feel real
is on my own
I'm sure I'm wrong
but I don't need nobody else
nobody else but me
I'm so convinced
don't let me in
I wrap my arms around me
turning in my bed and crying
I don't need nobody else
nobody else but me
I find so many traits about myself that I can't help to hate
I hate what I've become but I don't wanna be nobody else
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4. |
Nights
03:53
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I find myself at night
pulling out my hair cause I can never be enough
I'm hard to be around
I'm bad at playing nice
I find myself at night
pulling out my hair cause I can never be enough
I'm hard to be around
I'm bad at playing nice
I dressed it up
I chased around
desperate for a different crowd
I swear I was the weakest one
a fool for staying true to things that always made me roll my eyes
blind for telling stories that were true
about a coward I don't wanna be
always true to you but never true to me
I find myself at night
pulling out my hair cause I can never be enough
I'm hard to be around
I'm bad at playing nice
it fucked me up
so many times
I never slept around
I always held you close but I still feel like I'm screwing up
I ask my mom I ask my dad to tell me why I'm sad
grew up by telling stories to forget
about the girl I need to be
but never was and never will
and now she makes me wanna die
though i'm glad to be alive
I find myself at night
I find myself at night
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5. |
The God Concept
04:04
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I fall
every time and I
try to get up
and retrieve it
my mom
she said believe in God
cause God is love
and you need it
and I believe it
I call
every time that I
think I give up
and you hear me
my arms
cannot hold the love
that you try
to give up
you try to feed me
I try to grow
apart from my weakness
but I'm not weak
I'm just sleepless
I'm keeping
all those times
I sat around and bled out
everything was love
that I could not keep
don't drink from their wine
don't waste all your time
but go ahead and waste your life
on things you don't need and feel it
don't drink from their wine
don't waste all your time
but go ahead and waste your life
on things you don't need and feel alive
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